Dekimasen できません — translation: I can’t do it/can’t do.
In a garden of sorrow where pain and sadness grow, we see through others we don’t even know. How we are all the same in which everyone is in pain, in which we knew that we are the one to blame. The cause of these problems are none other than ourselves, that’s what we’re told. Yet others don’t even realize that it could be their fault. But according to this stupid mindset of ours, everything we did are all wrong.
“Stupid, useless, good for nothing.” Words that others hear every morning, which they can answer with, “I can do something, I’m always trying.” But those words are forever stored in our minds, cause we don’t know what could happen if we spoke like that. When we go to other places and hear the whisper of people who aren’t minding their own business, when we do our own fashion and get judged by people who aren’t to mention. We feel that we don’t even belong to this nation. But oh please forgive us for being born like this, take my apologies for I couldn’t change myself, pardon me cause I was meant to be a useless kid.
There was a story where this boy who acted cool like a typical school boy. You’ll never see that he’s in a tribulation, every time he went home. He was a slave of his own mind, someone who’s confused on his life. He couldn’t think that everything’s alright, cause he’s traumatized in all his life. The school is his only hope, for he could escape the hell-like world. Cause everything will change when his uncle comes home, for he’ll be suffering through actions and words. Even if he try to escape, he couldn’t cause he’s trapped forever in a cage where the key is nonexistent. He creates excuses on why he got scars on his face, worst thing is he already lost his confidence. No one knew what really happened for he just drifted away from his friends. And the last thing they knew, he was found dead. On the apartment 42, with his uncle standing near the door. Before he knew, he was covered in bruises and scars that made by the one and only great uncle he is. He was devastated and realized how lucky he was to have his nephew, but what he only do was to make him suffer.
As they said, you only know what you did when everything’s gone, you only realize what you have when it’s all in the air, people only realize that you mattered when you are in your grave.
All of us have problems just different levels, but most of us were begging for our lives to end, at the start of the year the population already decreased, what’s the cause? The toxicity. The toxicity of the people themselves. Do you even realize that you’re hurting others? Everyone can feel pain you know. Some have severe disorders and you just make them worse. You already know it could get to this but what did you do? You still continued what you think is right. Hurting people that couldn’t fight? Are you out of your mind?
This stupid thing I wrote is just to remind others, for those who read this, please beware of your actions. I think most of people already experienced depression, please I’m begging to watch your words before everything gets worse.
For those who read this and are having a bad time, you are not a waste of time. Talk to others and ask for help, don’t end your life for I beg.
